I have a confession to make: I’m a dweller. And sadly, I don’t mean in terms of habitation, I mean as in habitual. I know, not cool. (I should probably add that I’m actually both: I dwell in a house, as opposed to being a vagrant.)
I try not to brood, but I just can’t help myself. It’s as though it’s embedded in my genetic make-up. Maybe it is. Are personality traits predetermined by one’s DNA? Definite question for my clever Biology Doctor friend next time we have a dinner date. Anyway, many a time, following an unsavoury experience (usually coinciding with an unavoidable visit to a local town that goes by the name Unmentionable), I find myself musing on possible witty comebacks. Trying to wheel your pushchair through a heavy door, only to have it slammed in your face? Being patriotic and patiently waiting in line, only to have somebody queue-jump? Stupid oaf lifting a tray of boiling drinks ACROSS your SLEEPING BABY? I have been known to lie in bed at night, coming up with the perfect repartee should just that same experience recur. I sometimes even dream about it, and it feels mighty good. Until I wake up and feel a little pathetic and a lot annoyed.
I am the queen of avoir l’esprit de l’escalier.
I loathe regrets. They achieve precisely nothing, except high blood pressure. I want my lovely readers to avoid this feeling, following what *should be* the most special day of your lives. So I’ve put together a short guide to help you remember some of the most significant moments of your wedding.
For this post, I asked around for real-life examples of what my pals and clients have forgotten on their actual wedding days, bearing in mind the planning phase should be foolproof – that’s what lists are for! (Need some help? Here’s another great resource I put together for you!). Some of their answers may surprise you. But forewarned is forearmed, so they say, and hopefully their mistakes will save you a headache or two.
Your Wedding Day Checklist…
“I forgot to wear my garter.”
Not only is this sad for your new husband – he’s been waiting all day to rip that thing off with his teeth(!) – this is a missed photo opportunity, Ladies! The Angelina Jolie pose (you know the one I’m referring to) is a rite of passage on your wedding day.
“We forgot to get our guestbook signed.”
All the people you love most in the world, all in the same place to celebrate your joyous occasion. And the only legit time you will ever have to get them to gush about how much they love you and how beautiful you look. You are never reclaiming this moment, so you may as well milk it for all it’s worth. Have your DJ make an announcement several times during the reception.
“I forgot my ballet flats.”
You are the bride, therefore you must dance: this is a disastrous error of judgement. Make it your maid of honour’s responsibility. (And while we’re on the subject, point her in the direction of my guide to being a kickass bridesmaid…)
“I didn’t get a photo with ‘X’.”
Once more, you won’t have this opportunity again, so it’s imperative to get the photos you want. Unless you hang out in your wedding garb a la the ‘Friends’ cast. Which would make you a total loser. #justsaying #dontdoit #havesomedignity #maybejustonce
“We forgot to take a moment.”
Your special day will be breathtakingly perfect – it’s totally understandable if it flashes by so quick you forget to grab your spouse, take a step back, and appreciate the epic-ness of your planning and all it has achieved. But it would also be a travesty.
“I forgot my wedding gown bag.”
You’ll be wearing the dress. Its bag will be less of a priority when you’re somewhat worse for wear and heading off to the bridal suite/airport. However, on your return to reality, when it transpires the bag has been chucked out with the venues rubbish (astonishing, I know), this will be a time for sad reflection. And you can trust me on that because this one is mine. I never did recover the bag, and my dress feels somehow incomplete. *Broods on witty repartee to venue management on hearing this tragic news*
“I didn’t remember to remove my engagement ring.”
DON’T FORGET TO SWITCH YOUR ENGAGEMENT RING TO YOUR RIGHT HAND PRIOR TO THE CEREMONY! This one comes care of every bride, everywhere, ever. (Else it’s just me and my divvy mates?)
“We forgot to eat some of our wedding cake.”
You painstakingly chose your preferred combination of sponge, icing and fondant. You should damn-well get to enjoy the result on the day for which it was intended! Yes, it can probably be frozen, but it’s not the same.
I hope these pointers will stand you in good stead, but the most important thing to remember is this:
Your wedding day is about your marriage. If you’re marrying the right man, your day is already perfect. The rest is just pretty details.
Have I missed anything from my list? What did you forget? Please share in the comments. And if this list has been useful, please spread the love and share the post.