Planning a wedding is a lot of fun – it’s also a lot of stress. The bride may be unsure of which errands to take care of herself, and which to delegate as chief bridesmaid duties – because she’s probably not done this before! If you’re lucky enough to be one of the chosen few to be by her side on the day, then it’s your job to help the bride get hitched – without a hitch. I’ve put together a nifty little list of the top responsibilities you can take on how to be a brilliant bridesmaid and make sure the celebrations go off with a bang…

Chief Bridesmaid Duties to Earn Your Badge!

1. Plan the Hen

This is hands down the most tedious project, simply because it involves so many people’s diaries. Pinning down a date is enough to turn even the most serene bride into Bridezilla. Organise the plans for her and she will be forever grateful (and you can sneak in one or two cheeky surprises this way too).

2. Join Her Exercise Class for Support

She will inevitably buy her dress a size small, or just want to tone up a little. Show some support, and get a little perkier yourself in the process. And if she wants any help with her diet in the run-up to the wedding, share my post with her about a diet that actually works long-term.

Chief bridesmaid duties plus 10 top tips for how to be a brilliant bridesmaid and help the bride plan her wedding. The best ways you can help the bride. #weddingplanning #bridesmaidduties #bridesmaid

3. Take Her Underwear Shopping

She may not have even considered this yet, but it is of at least equal importance to the actual dress.

The wrong underwear could ruin her entire look, or result in a wardrobe malfunction. Get a date in the diary for this ASAP. (FYI: for bigger busted women intending to wear a backless dress – this is akin to Mission Impossible. Or is it? Check out how I overcame this dilemma here.)

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4. Put Together a Bridal Emergency Kit for the Wedding Day, à la Mary Poppins

When she needs plasters, boob tape or flat shoes, she will remember why you are her BFF.

5. Help with the Table Plan

I lied about the hen, this is the most tedious (and stressful) part of planning a wedding. Her fiancé won’t be able to sympathise like a woman can. Tip: provide wine and chocolate.

6. Put the Favours Together

This is also tedious; she has more important things to be doing. And when you agreed to be bridesmaid, you also implicitly accepted all dull tasks. Suck it up princess.


7. Keep an Eye on Her Food Intake

Make sure she eats and drinks enough (water) on the day so she doesn’t get drunk. I once attended a wedding where the groom was unconscious by 7pm. I like to think us girls have a little more decorum, but this is easily done, albeit inadvertently. Anxiety + excitement = lack of appetite. Empty stomach + stiff drink to settle nerves = disaster.

How to Be a Brilliant Bridesmaid - Bridesmaid's Feet

8. Tell Her ‘You Look Beautiful’

It’s so obvious that you may forget to actually say it. But it really will mean the world to her, especially if you save it for when she needs a little confidence boost, right before she makes her big entrance.

9. Help Move Accoutrements To/From the Venue

The day before the wedding she will be tearing around with a million different jobs to get done, whilst simultaneously trying to beautify herself. That may be a slight exaggeration, but it will feel like the truth to her. Take some pressure off by playing gofer.

10. Check Venue Protocol for Clearing Paraphernalia

On the evening of my wedding, approximately half hour before the DJ finished his set, we were told by staff that we needed to clear the Bridal Suite of the venue. Since we knew we could come back the following day to collect our things, we were totally unprepared and we missed guests leaving in order to comply. You can help by making sure you know ahead of time what their policy is.

How to Be a Brilliant Bridesmaid

Of course, this list is by no means exhaustive since every bride will have her own ideas and priorities; but it is fairly comprehensive in terms of the most useful errands you can help out with. It goes without saying that most of these should be run by the bride as offers of assistance, while several others can make very thoughtful surprises. (I didn’t say so, but… Set the bar high and make yourself indispensable, and you know that when it’s your turn, you’ll be in store for a reciprocally helpful bridesmaid. You’re welcome.)

Check out my post for help getting started with item one: planning the hen.

If you found this post helpful for ideas of how to be a brilliant bridesmaid, please consider sharing!



An award-nominated blogger and author, Kate is an experienced breastfeeding advocate, and expert baby sleep chaser. Her writing has appeared on Mothercare, Huff Post, and BritMums.

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